~Broken-Paper-Doll

Well today i get to get up on stage in the cafeteria here at the college.... and read one of my poems.
Oh, not just read, it's spoken word.
And sure, i've done it in front of my mirror, and sure i've read and spoken things in front of crowds.
But spoken word....on stage....at my school.....Very new and Very scary.
I'll be reciting this one: [link]
As you can tell, it's much better with a voice than on paper....no pun intended.

Wish me luck...i'll probably swallow my tongue.

So i hit 10,000 pageviews like...59 pageviews ago....and I, nor any one else caught it
Makes me a sad child.

But seriously?
I've been here for 4 fucking years
and 10,000 pageviews
that's worse than pathetic
especially since i have (including stuff i've put in scraps) over 300 submitions, and have removed a good amount as well.
No body reads poetry anymore
they're lazy and just want to look at the pretty pictures

Unfortunately, this is not an artist on dA....at least as far as i know.
I was in a small RP thingy, and this was her description, a small poem she wrote. I fell in love with it:

~ Rock-a-bye baby, from shadows I come.
~Someone once told me all wrongs will be undone.
~Rock-a-bye baby, to all those who died: ~I am here now to fight by your side.
~Rock-a-bye baby, still I must kill.
~I am the monster that slaughters for thrills.
~Rock-a-bye baby, from peace comes new war.
~I have returned, wakened by gore.
~Rock-a-bye baby, there's blood on the ground.
~There's demons and ghosts that hunt with no sound.
~Rock-a-bye baby. Oh, Father can't you see?
~What once was locked up, has now been set free.

her site: [link]

Yes, i just called love the "Universal Death Wish" bite me.

i've been wondering about this for some time.
Because i'm in love (yes yes corny smile, get it over with....done? good.) And as well as treasuring it, i Hate it!
Because all the time i see it tear people down. Just a few words, and love will have you on your knees, stripped of dignity. And we dont care.
Today, i got to hear one of my best friends crying so hard i wanted to die just from the sound.
She loved this guy so much, she's let him tear her down a few times, and he did it again today.
I've had other friends turn out so cold after a devastating end to love.
And me? Jon can whither me with one look, i couldnt imagine what he could do with some final words.
And i hate having that weakness. I was so logical, smart, cold, all of that before him. I got things done, and i was never stressed because i didnt bother much with the emotions.
But now, along with the wonderful feelings, trust, joy, etc. (all the corny crap) it's a weakness. Letting someone have such a power over me. a power over my whole World and soul.

But still, we ache for it, long for it, cry for it.
That feeling of being able to trust someone completely, that escape, that content happiness. We strive to find it. And jump through hoops to keep it. Eternal companionship. Herd animals to the extreme?
*sigh*
i'm rambeling. But really.

Unfortunately, this is not an artist on dA....at least as far as i know.
I was in a small RP thingy, and this was her description, a small poem she wrote. I fell in love with it:

~ Rock-a-bye baby, from shadows I come.
~Someone once told me all wrongs will be undone.
~Rock-a-bye baby, to all those who died: ~I am here now to fight by your side.
~Rock-a-bye baby, still I must kill.
~I am the monster that slaughters for thrills.
~Rock-a-bye baby, from peace comes new war.
~I have returned, wakened by gore.
~Rock-a-bye baby, there's blood on the ground.
~There's demons and ghosts that hunt with no sound.
~Rock-a-bye baby. Oh, Father can't you see?
~What once was locked up, has now been set free.

her site: [link]

Well, today was my last day of class at the college for about two weeks.
it's nice, but i still have to write an essay this weekend wanna do it for me? hehe

But this means i will be getting up at 6 every morning, just to go to the HS for like, 2 hours. LAME
so i will have a TON of free time.
so if you're bored.
let me know,
we can be together ^_^

if you wanna just chill, do a photoshoot, go riding, learn to ride a horse go to a movie, anything. let me know, i'll most likely have the time!
there is my boyfriend. but he has weird hours, and sometimes goes to be about the time i wake up, so...yeah, if i'm not with him, i'm most likely sitting at home getting fat. so come get me!

i've never really liked spring break. last year was cool because i went to CA, but i cant do that this year because i have my meet at during the week my sisters are off.
OH!
speaking of my next meet
wanna come? ^___^ lemme know

but yeah. if you're bored, lonely, w/e, gimme a call. dont have my number, note me, IM me, email me, all the high-tech junk and i'll give it to you.

Unfortunately, this is not an artist on dA....at least as far as i know.
I was in a small RP thingy, and this was her description, a small poem she wrote. I fell in love with it:

~ Rock-a-bye baby, from shadows I come.
~Someone once told me all wrongs will be undone.
~Rock-a-bye baby, to all those who died: ~I am here now to fight by your side.
~Rock-a-bye baby, still I must kill.
~I am the monster that slaughters for thrills.
~Rock-a-bye baby, from peace comes new war.
~I have returned, wakened by gore.
~Rock-a-bye baby, there's blood on the ground.
~There's demons and ghosts that hunt with no sound.
~Rock-a-bye baby. Oh, Father can't you see?
~What once was locked up, has now been set free.

her site: [link]

As most of you know, i have some issues with my body.
Due to a car accident-back/neck problems
Due to horses-tendonitis and other issues in my knees
Due to genetics or unknown- skin and teeth problems
Due to disease- severe lung problems
And Now!?!
I have higher cholesterol than my dad.
yeah, my score is 215! My dad's is 206 and they made him start taking stuff.
The worst part...i dont really eat junk. i eat some, everyone does, it's unavoidable. but i only eat fast food maybe once every 2 months. i dont excersize a lot, but a normal amount, but the past few months i stepped it up a lot.
Doctor thinks it is all the dairy and red meat. Which is basically what half the things i eat are >.< but that's it? it can't be Just that, can it? There is a possiblity it is genetic, i need to call my gradmother, but still!
how can i have That high of cholesterol? i mean, i have enough problems as it is, half the things i wanted to do, i cant because of my body's limitations, and now this shit?!?! UHG!
So, even though i already Was on one, I'm going on a diet, i guess. There isnt much i can do, i'm excersizing, i already planned to do more when i have a car. But i acnt stand diets, i love food especially red meat! Bastards.

So i only have one more week of my classes here at pierce! woo!
Then i have a two week spring break.
Then i start my new classes. which will be Government, Poetry, and Anatomy and Physiology.
kinda cool i guess, except for the government one *gag* but at least i'm taking hat one online.

I have to write and essay this weekend for my english class, and then start and finish another by the end of next week.
and i have two tests next week.
kinda stressful, but not terrible, at least my teachers arent making us take a final!

thats about it for now